AOL Health asked sex therapist and AOL Coach Ian Kerner, author of "Love in the Time of Colic: The New Parents' Guide to Getting It On Again," to weigh in on what husbands keep from their wives and why they do it. Read on to find out what he really thinks about post-coital cuddling, guy time and more.

AOL Health: Why do men really need alone time with their guy friends?

Ian Kerner: We need our own independence. We need to hang out with people we knew before you who know a different side of us. We need to not necessarily be always on our best behavior. We want to act sophomoric and make stupid jokes. We want to curse and watch a B-movie with Eric Roberts. That leaves us feeling better about coming home and about being with you because we had a chance to recharge our individual battery. Not everything has to be about the relationship.

AOL Health: Do men cuddle just to appease their partners?

Kerner: Men enjoy nonsexual physical affection. We enjoy kissing and hugging. Men tend to get aroused quickly, so that often leads to a desire to have sex, but that doesn't mean we don’t want the emotional connection that comes with cuddling.

AOL Health: Then why don't they always want to cuddle after sex?

Kerner: It's funny. After you have sex, especially if you're in a long-term relationship, that's not always the time when a guy's looking to cuddle. He might have other things on his mind. He still has 20 emails to do for work before the end of the night or he's totally spent and exhausted. He's really happy, but it's time to go to sleep. It's more about appreciating that guys love to cuddle, just not always at the times that you would expect them to.

A lot of women get hung up on, "He doesn't' like to cuddle after sex, he just rolls over and starts snoring." There are other times where we might really want to cuddle. It could be when we're cozying up on the couch together or taking a walk through the park or just spontaneous hug that can just happen in the middle of the afternoon. But guys definitely do care and appreciate the emotional connection that comes with cuddling.

AOL Health: Should women be concerned if their husbands watch porn?

Kerner: A lot of women get freaked out because they know guys masturbate and they're into porn. In most cases women shouldn't get bent out of shape. In fact, A) We really prefer being with an actual woman. B) We prefer being with you and C) as a sex therapist, I have talked to hundreds of men about what they fantasize about when [they're masturbating]. Very often they fantasize to thoughts of the woman that they're with or to hot sexual memories of being with her. It's important to know that we think you're hot, and you're still the one we fantasize about, and we'll pick you over an airbrushed, silicone implanted porn star.

AOL Health: If a woman needs to be reassured that her significant other still finds her sexually attractive, how should she approach him?

Kerner: Most guys don't want to be embarrassed or confronted. Try to make sex talk sexy. If he's pretty open and upfront about porn, try asking, "are those girls so much sexier than me?" Generally what you're going to get is a guy who's a little flustered because he's just going to say, "don't worry about, you still look sexy to me." Ninety-nine percent of the time that's true.

AOL Health: What do men really think about relationship routines?

Kerner: Routines are boring. Routines are claustrophobic. Routines make men feel like we're not living a passionate life. Routines make us feel like we're in prison, and you shouldn't be a prison guard. It's not your fault, but that's what relationships become about, responsibility, predictably. It's easy to feel claustrophobic and pent up and penned in and sometimes we take it out on you, so don't be our guard be our liberator.