Lies Women Tell Their Doctors

Lies Women Tell Their Doctors

Courtesy of Redbook

It's normal to fib about some things. "So sorry we won't make the potluck -- can't find a sitter." You promise your mother you'll call. But the one person you should never, ever lie to is your doctor. Yet we do. All the time...

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The Danger

A national survey recently revealed that 52 percent of women routinely stretch the truth when they talk to their doctors -- exaggerating how much exercise they get, lowballing how much they smoke or drink, even hiding sexual behavior. We lie, mainly, because we know we're not being as dedicated as we should and we don't want to feel judged or endure a lecture we've heard before. (Hey, we're not stupid. Lazy, perhaps, but not stupid!)

Other lies just...slip out. It can be hard in a short visit to bring up behavior we might be ashamed of (even if there's no reason to be -- docs have seen and heard it all before, and worse). We figure, what's the harm in omitting a few minor details -- like that STD we had in college, or that one time we forgot to take our birth control?

In fact, more than a quarter of the women in the survey didn't believe their lies were a big deal. But lying to the one person who really needs to know the truth -- and is bound by doctor/patient privilege and federal law to keep that info private -- can be a very big deal. When you tell even a fib, your doctor can't diagnose you correctly, which wastes your time and money and may keep her from giving treatment that could save your life. So the next time you're tempted to make like Pinocchio with one of the following falsehoods, here's the truth about why you should tell nothing but.


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OTC MEDICINES: The lie: "I'm not taking any medication."

This one's told so often, doctors say, that they always dig deeper when they hear it. Sometimes it's an honest mistake: "People don't classify over-the-counter drugs like Tylenol, herbal supplements, or vitamins as medication," says Gillian Stephens, M.D., an assistant professor of community and family medicine at Saint Louis University in St. Louis. "But they are." Women also keep mum, though, when they've "borrowed" an Ambien from a friend or bought Hoodia online to lose weight.


Why you should come clean:

If you tell your doctor your medication isn't working, or has side effects, he can find one that suits you better (which is what Alicia's new doc eventually did). But if you don't use it correctly, you could end up even sicker.

Take a typically misused drug like a routine antibiotic: "If you lie and say you finished your antibiotics, but you're still sick, the doctor will assume the first drug didn't work," says Maurice A. Ramirez, D.O., Ph.D., an emergency-room physician at Florida Hospital-Flagler Division in Palm Coast. "So he'll change the antibiotic. Meanwhile, the bacteria become resistant to the drug we normally use, and they crank along unimpeded, and you can go from a bladder infection to a kidney inflection to a blood infection."


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FLOSSING: The lie:"Of course I floss!"

"When I was in practice, I heard this lie every day," laughs Paula Jones, D.D.S., now president of the Academy of General Dentistry. "I'd ask, 'How often?'" And the truth would start to come out. "They'd say, 'Oh, a couple of times a week' or 'I only do this one tooth where food gets caught.'"


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Why you should come clean:

Neglecting to floss leads directly to tooth decay, gum inflammation, and gum disease -- and a growing body of research suggests that gum disease may contribute to cardiovascular disease. Some studies also suggest a link between gum disease and a life-threatening pregnancy complication called preeclampsia. If you cop to being a non-flosser, your dentist can make doubly sure to watch for and help you prevent these dangerous conditions.

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STDS: The lie: "I've never had an STD."

"Many women are embarrassed about having had a sexually transmitted disease," says Dimino. Jessica, 37, never let on that she'd had chlamydia and HPV in college because she was afraid she'd be denied health insurance when setting up her own business. But she also believed it wasn't anyone else's affair. "My feeling was: That was then; it's taken care of, so they don't need to know," says the Littleton, CO, Web designer.


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Why you should come clean:

The ghosts of STDs past can come back to haunt you later. Hiding that you had HPV may put you at higher risk for cervical cancer if your gyno doesn't think you need annual Pap tests. Keeping quiet may also put you at risk for pregnancy complications.
For instance, if your doctor knows you've had gonorrhea or chlamydia -- especially if you also developed pelvic inflammatory disease -- she'll watch more carefully for ectopic pregnancy, since both can scar the fallopian tubes, preventing a fertilized egg from reaching the uterus. And telling your ob that you have genital herpes when you're pregnant may help you avoid a predelivery flare-up -- and a C-section as a result. "If you tell me you have it, even if your last flare-up was ages ago, I can put you on medication to suppress an outbreak before delivery," says Dimino.


DRINKING: The lie: "I'm not a big drinker."

Doctors have an unspoken rule: Whatever you tell them you drink, they double it. "Lots of women claim, 'I drink once a week,'" says Rakhi Dimino, M.D., an ob/gyn at the Woman's Hospital of Texas in Houston. "But then they drink six or seven cocktails in an evening."

"I always lie about drinking," admits Amanda, 33, an entertainment coordinator from Orlando, FL. "My doctor prescribed me the antidepressant Zoloft and told me not to drink any alcohol while taking it. Then I went to a wine tasting and drank anyway." That night, she awoke in a cold sweat with heart palpitations. "At the emergency room, the doctor asked me which drugs I was on. When I said Zoloft, he asked if I'd taken any drugs or drunk any alcohol. I flat-out lied and said that I'd had not a drop."

The ER staff tried to sleuth out what else could be making Amanda ill; then her blood alcohol test came back. "The doctor said, 'The test shows you've been drinking, and this is a common reaction with Zoloft and alcohol.' He told me that I would have saved a lot of time and money if I'd been honest. I didn't say a thing. I just wanted to get out of there with my tail between my legs."


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Why you should come clean:

Drug and alcohol interactions are very common. If your doctor knows that you imbibe, even a little, she can prescribe meds that won't mix badly with a glass of wine. She can also counsel you on alcohol's risks for women. For starters, having one to two drinks a day can raise your risk for breast cancer; heavy consumption is linked to liver disease, brain damage, and stroke and can put you at risk for assault and car accidents.

Concealing what you drink may signal another disease: "Denial is part of addiction," says Brenda Iliff, clinical director of Hazelden Women's Recovery Center in Center City, MN.


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