Stress Management: Reducing Stress By Being Assertive: What Is Assertive Communication

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What is assertive communication?

Assertive communication means speaking up for yourself in a thoughtful, tactful way. It's one of the three main styles of communication. The other two are passive communication and aggressive communication. If you are passive or aggressive, you might get better results by trying to be assertive instead.

In passive communication, you may not express your opinions, feelings, and needs. You may be uncomfortable speaking your mind, especially when you are with supervisors or people you see as important. When you are passive, you don't take part in decisions that affect you, or you don't take a stand on issues that are important to you. Being passive can make you feel like you have no control over a situation. Feeling a lack of control leads to stress.

In aggressive communication, you honestly state your opinions, feelings, and needs, but you do it at the expense of others. You may be seen as rude or demanding. And being aggressive often offends others. Their negative reaction can lead to stress for everyone.

In assertive communication, you state your opinions, feelings, and needs openly. You do this in a respectful, tactful, and thoughtful way. In most cases, being assertive works better than being passive or aggressive.

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Last updated:	April 25, 2007
Author:	Jeannette Curtis
Reviewed By:	Kathleen Romito, MD - Family Medicine, Paul J. Rosch, MD
Editors:	Susan Van Houten, RN, BSN, MBA, Michele Cronen